Friday, March 6, 2009

Can I say it yet? "I TOLD YOU SO!"

I waited. Really, I did. A whole 6 weeks.

But, I'm finally going to say it. I TOLD YOU SO!

To all the moderate Dems and moderate Reps: I told you so!

To all the Clinton Dems who followed party over principle: I told you so!

No, The One is not a moderate or even a Democrat. He's a ditherer (Krugman) who "doesn't get it" when it comes to the stock market (Weekly Standard) who caused the stock market slide (Business Week) and the majority of BW poll respondents think he's screwed up the economy. Oh, and Steve Forbes believes The One is repeating Bush's worst mistakes and dooming the US.

In other words, he's not up to the job. So, on Wall Street, is the buyer's remorse greater for worthless Citi stock or O votes? How about Main Street?

Thursday, February 5, 2009

The One Has No Clue But Don't Take My Word For It

The One has had a rough week. On Tuesday (2/3), I blogged about the little voice in my head (OK, one of many) that kept screaming, "He doesn't know what he's doing!" Well, it turns out that I'm not the only one with a nagging internal voice. Or, the voice in my head has gotten so loud it's now communicating with Beltway pundits. Yeah, probably the second one.

The Recap:

Award for Most Energetic and Frankest - Lindsey Graham on Fox News calling BO "AWOL" from leadership. There's video here.

Award for Snarkiest (in a good way) - Andrea Tantaros of Fox News, calling the first two weeks "amateur hour."

Award for I Told You So - Dana Milbank asking if the Obamara honeymoon is over. He documents the President and First Lady's flight to their favorite child's class to escape the White House. Escape? It's gonna be a long four years. Oh, and, yeah, they dote on their youngest child, the one who looks happy. The older one seems to be an afterthought. If I've picked this up in cursory reviews of pix on the interwebs, I can't imagine what it must be like in person. Note to BO PR: try to get the Mrs. to look like she cares about her firstborn.

Award for Having the Nerve to State the Obvious - tie and both go to RedState. First up is Jeff Emanuel examining why the Majority Party is acting like the Minority. Next, is Ken Taylor stating up front that BHO is "In Way Over His Head and It Shows."

We knew the halo would slip but who had "2 weeks" in the office pool? I mean, other than Hillary.

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

(shhhh ... The One doesn't know what he's doing)

I realize that we're only two weeks into The One's presidency. (Have the oceans ceased to rise yet?) But, I sense a trend forming. AND IT SCARES THE SHIT OUT OF ME!

When BO propped up his Turbo Tax-challenged "financial whiz" for Treasury Secretary, I had a sneaking suspicion that The One had no fucking clue about economics, finance, Wall Street, or sub prime mortgages. My sinking feeling was that Geithner, the "wunderkind" who couldn't read the gazillion or so reminders from the IMF that he had to pay the taxes for which he'd requested reimbursement IN WRITING, was BO's great plan to save the US from bankruptcy. It looked to me like The One was outsourcing his economic plan to "an expert" because he couldn't tell a credit default swap from a swap meet. And, I believe I'm right.

That's not the scary part.

How many times have we been told by both Democrats and Republicans that Geithner is THE ONLY ONE WHO CAN SAVE THE ECONOMY? Yeah, well, it turns out he's been involved in every bad economic government decision made since Lehman's sent out a gold-threaded SOS this summer. Oops.

So, now I have a new sinking feeling. Maybe Geither has no fucking clue, either? Maybe he's just a pawn of the Wall Street crowd? Maybe he didn't pay his taxes because he's a tax cheat with a wonky moral compass instead of a wonk who can't read basic English? Maybe he subscribes to the Helmsley school of tax thought?

Let's recap:
  1. President with the financial acumen of your average high school freshman but we taxpayers are the parents he's hitting up for cash.
  2. Treasury Secretary who can't understand a form that says "you owe this much money."
  3. Treasury Secretary who paid up his taxes when he got caught, not out of legal and moral obligation like the rest of us chumps. (Note to TG: there's no statute of limitations on owed taxes if you intentionally didn't pay what you owed.)
  4. TS who has the financial acumen of your average college freshman but we taxpayers are the parents he's hitting up for cash to pay off his poker debts to pals Hank, Ben, Bob, and John.

Two weeks in may be a little early to panic. Or not. I'm switching to Panic Mode Plan M: First, we're going to need a harder mattress. Then I'm going to convert our savings into gold, silver and copper pipe, and stash it all between the box spring and the mattress until the economy recovers or we get an administration with a clue. Yeah, we better get used to sleeping with a piece of metal up our ... never mind. Many Americans are going to have that feeling soon.

Tuesday, January 6, 2009

Atlantic Monthly Needs a Genetics Lesson

There's something a little off about an Asian-American professor rejoicing in the thesis that "white America" and "white culture", meaning mainstream American culture, are doomed to insignificance. In a disturbing and, frankly, racist piece, Hua Hsu gleefully posits that "white Americans" will soon become the minority - and by soon I mean 30 years. (Keep in mind it's in Atlantic Monthly, home to the blogosphere's resident hysteric and formerly a respected publication.)

I'm not going to get into Hsu's ridiculous assertions about Fitty Cent's social relevance or Sean "Can't Pick a Nickname" Combs' parties in the Hamptons. No, I'm going to discredit the whole sorry premise.

Ever heard of inter-racial dating?

Let's use Hsu's favorite example, Tiger Woods. Yes, he's African-American. He's also a proud Thai-American and - God forbid! - a proud Unhyphenated American. He married a Swede. Something tells me he's not that hung up on racial identity since he married a woman from another continent. What will his kids look like? With such attractive parents, they'll probably be gorgeous - and American.

The most obvious rebuttal to Hsu's bizarre hypothesis is the science of genetics. Each parent donates an allele (gene) to the child. Dark alleles are dominant over light. That's why Black and White couples usually produce dark kids. One parent's dark allele dominates the other parent's light one.

Now, let's move on a generation. If those "mixed-race" kids marry other "mixed-race" kids or -God forbid! - white people, they could produce white kids.

Let me repeat that: second generation "mixed-race" kids can produce WHITE kids.

If each parent passes on the "white" allele to their child, the child will be white and not a person of color. Ever. Those dark alleles are gone, genetically speaking.

Uh oh! There goes Hsu's theory of The Great Brown Wave.

We need to keep one thing in mind. Just because people appear "white" doesn't mean that they've lost their ethnic heritages. You're still part Japanese or Guatemalan or Black even if you don't "look" it. Maybe defining people by color or ethnic background is so last century?

There's nothing wrong with being brown or black. Nor is there anything wrong with being white. That we even have to say this exposes the ugliness of Hsu's article. Throughout this "expert's" piece is the insidious smugness that "white Americans" are going to get a much deserved comeuppance in a few short decades, for what, other than being melanin-challenged, the author doesn't bother to say. Could there be anything less American in spirit than punishing innocents for the color of their skin?

Here's my prediction. Americans will soon tire of being hyphenated much the same way hyphenated wives drop one name. "Mixed-race" kids will tire of society asking them to choose a parent every time they check an identity box. The racial lines will blur and - God forbid! - these kids will be far lighter than race-obsessed liberals can imagine, not because of some hideous plot or racial injustice. Because it's the way nature works.

When racial definitions become obsolete, will professors like Hsu rejoice that America will finally have lived up to its promise? Don't bet on it. Then, their race-based theories will be doomed to insignificance, the same oblivion they wish on mainstream American culture.

Tuesday, December 9, 2008

Princess Caroline - Dauphine in Waiting

Well, there goes the democracy.

It seems Princess Caroline, one of the most famous Ivy-league moms, is growing restless as her brood matures and her empty nest looms. What's a well-married well-connected political dabbler to do with her time now that her chauffeur is driving fewer carpool routes?

More charity work? Yeah, but that's been getting old, like she is. She's 50ish, ya know. No, she wants to move into the family business without having even run for school board. But, who cares? She's a Kennedy! It's in her genes! What more could she need to be a US Senator when our country is in two bad wars and wobbling on a financial precipice?

Besides, she can always ask her children for help if she's stumped about foreign policy or tax levies. During the primary, she turned to her kids for advice on which candidate to back. They convinced her to vote for Obambi - because those teens know cool when they see it. (Experienced? Capable? Not so much. Not so important, it appears, to our political dabbler/aspirant.) Perhaps her husband can explain the financial crisis. After all, he's an artist and many of these financial instruments were very creative.

What the hell? Wall Street and Bush's wars have flushed America down the toilet. Why shouldn't our cherished democratic ideals be next?

So, let's put the grossly unqualified Kennedy Dauphine in the Senate. It's only a weigh-station until the presidency becomes available. Then, after fruitless flirtations with the Bushes and Clintons, we can anoint the rightful heiress to the throne by acclamation, gutting the republic but restoring Camelot and fulfilling America's promise - as a mass of sentimental, ignoramuses enthralled by fairy tales, angels, legacies, simple solutions and Oprah's favorite things.

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

Secretary Palin? No, not that kind of secretary!

After his hopey-changey hangover, perhaps Senator Obama will push away the fog and see one of his best potential cabinet members standing across the aisle.

Yes, in the spirit of bringing the country together, Obama should ask another Republican to join his merry band of men and women. How does Secretary of Energy Sarah Palin sound? According to wiki (and what isn't these days?), the only President to actually reach out to the other party to fill this position was Jimmy Carter. (OK, he was also the only one fired. It's not a perfect analogy, after all, since Palin is a woman and is not a former Secretary of Defense.)

Palin's would-be predecessors would include Hazel O'Leary, the first woman and first African American, Federico Pena, the first Hispanic, and perennial presidential candidate -- and a man better known as Judas to James Carville -- Bill Richardson, the second Hispanic and New Mexico's outgoing governor.

Granted, my quick and dirty review of previous Energy Secretaries' was neither exhaustive nor scholarly. Nevertheless, recent candidates seemed to have combined less energy expertise than Gov. Palin.

So, there you go. If Obama really wants a cabinet that reflects America, selecting Governor Palin as Energy Secretary is a three-pointer with nothing but net. She's a Republican, has extensive experience, and hails from underrepresented but vitally important Alaska.

Yeah, giving the governor a real portfolio could do a lot to undo her airhead image. That's not good for the Dems. But, this is a critical post. He needs her to succeed. Besides, unlike his appointments to fellow Dem primary foes, this one would show that he's serious about burying the hatchet not the political bodies.

Palin is very popular with women who feel she was trashed by the misogynistic media. Married woman and mothers adore her. Her appointment would speak volumes about her gravitas on energy and that he's serious about having a bipartisan cabinet.

And, as an added bonus, who else can whip up some moose burgers at Camp David?

Saturday, October 25, 2008

Don't Go West, Old Man - Ear-Plugs Ticket Freaks Over Tough Interview

Barbara West, a reporter at WFTV in Orlando, Florida, may find herself in the gulag if her interview subject is elected VP next month. West had the temerity to ask the Plugged One some tough questions on the minds of American voters. Now, the station has been barred from ANY interviews with the Ear-Plugs Ticket and a tete-a-tete with Jill Biden was immediately cancelled. Nice.

But, more important, HAS BIDEN HAD AN EYE LIFT??? He's looked Botoxed since his ass-whooping by Gov. Sarah Palin in the VP debate, as noted by Michelle Malkin. (She calls this the best Biden interview ever.)

So, let's recap:
  • hair plugs
  • eye lift
  • Botox
  • younger wife
  • obviously capped teeth in Hollywood White (an actual color, ask your dentist)
  • bristles when questioned

Yup. The Plugged One has some ego. Hey, Ms. West, maybe you should have asked about his cosmetic surgery rather than his campaign's cosmetic policies.